My ICU Review: Addenbrooke’s

It was my birthday 2 days ago, I am now 24! Hooray!! ! πŸŽˆπŸŽ‰

How did I celebrate? Well…i had to attend my ICU review at Addenbrooke’s in Cambridge! Yeah…not a way to celebrate but it was a really positive day and I would love to share with you fellow superheroes!

I was really calm about attending my review; my first review at King’s Lynn I was a quivering wreck. I think because I had already experienced a Critical Care review, this helped me to prepare for my review at Cambridge.

God bless you Greater Anglia for free Wi-Fi! Not sure if I could have endured the train journey there and back without it! πŸ˜‚πŸ™

*WARNING MAY BE DISTRESSING FOR SOME READERS*

I think there should be a Sat-Nav for Addenbrooke’s as it is a maze! I lost count the amount of times we got lost and even some staff members didn’t know where to direct us! It was funny but in a way I am glad we got lost because we turned a corner and infront of us, there was a door.

I thought to myself, ‘I remember that door.’

It wasn’t just any door. It was the door that led to a garden. The garden in which I went to, during my time in ICU and I thought that it would be the last time I would ever be able to go outside.

I sat in my wheelchair, in the exact spot I was in 10 months ago.

And now…

I looked at the buildings around me, thinking back to when I looked into Ewans eyes and they were the most perfect blue eyes I had ever seen, just before the first photo was took. It was a beautiful moment that I will never forget.

We had 30 minutes to spare, or in our case continue looking for where we needed to go!

Thankfully, mum spotted a sign for the department and we finally signed in with a few minutes to spare.

At first, we saw a nurse and she explained that the purpose of my review is to hopefully answer any questions I have and to discuss my progress.

She then handed me a booklet which was a diary that the ICau nurses kept for me.. they wrote about how I was, who came to visit me. The nurse asked if I was OK with the picture that was in the diary. I only remember 1 photo and I was hoping it was the one I was thinking of.

I remember this being took, the lovely nurses had arranged for a dog to come and visit me, to cheer me up. I can’t remember his name but he was so soft and incredibly gentle. He was a BIG boy though!

It didn’t make me cry when I saw the photo, I just smiled.

There were quite a few entries from various nurses, in my diary, so I wanted to read them when I got home.

The nurse asked if I had any questions about my time in ICU. I only had a few in mind which were

  • Did I have sepsis? – In my discharge summary, from rehab, it stated that I had sepsis. Thankfully, the nurse confirmed that I did not have sepsis. Honestly, I don’t think my body could take much more if I had contracted it.
  • Was I close to death? – Some of you may think it was a silly question to ask but for me, I was curious because i had been through so much and every doctor is surprised that I survived. The nurse said that my body was incredibly weak. She couldn’t say anything else.
  • Was I in a coma? – I know I was in a coma at King’s Lynn but there were days at Addenbrooke’s that I cannot remember at all. She told me I was slightly sedated so that explained why I could only remember patches.

After a few more minutes of chatting, we had to see a consultant – not sure why but I am just assuming that it was routine. He asked me if I would like to see the ward I was on, the one before being transferred back to King’s Lynn. I was prepared this time so I agreed. I am glad he took us to the ward because God knows where we would have ended up!

Nurses still remembered me but I could only remember a few. There was one nurse in particular that I really wanted to see, Will, it was his day off. He was a diamond and always made me smile. The girls said they would tell him I was asking after him and how I was doing.

I eventually saw the bay I was in. There was a patient in the bed, asleep. I looked at all the nurses and thought ‘They really know what they’re doing’ and within seconds, something just clicked inside my head.

I was well looked after, they deal with a variety of situations on a daily basis. At that time, when I was the patient, I didn’t know that. I didn’t know these people so I didn’t trust them. I quickly realised that I would not have got this far if they had not looked after me.

Now, I accept what has happened to me, I accept it was very traumatic, I accept I may still experience flashbacks. I accept it all.

And I’m OK with thatπŸ™‚

12 Comments

    1. Thank you so much! I will admit, there have been times where I think ‘how am I so calm about it all?’ It is one of my goals to support others who have been through something similar. It’s a journey that should not be taken alone ❀

      Liked by 1 person

  1. Whatever you’ve been through you were so brave and I think it’s incredible that you’re sharing your story, you should be so proud! I have followed your blog and can not wait to read more from you!

    Liked by 1 person

  2. A very moving post, Ami. I had tears in my eyes reading it. You have come such a long way in a short period of time – well done! You should be very proud of yourself. Your story will help to inspire others in a similar situation. Thanks for sharing. xx πŸ™‚

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you so much, I was crying my eyes out writing this, not sad tears but I think tears of relief because I have finally accepted it all ❀

      Liked by 1 person

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