Alanna’s guest post is the 15th post in the segment on my blog, called “The Reality Of…” which gives others the ability to share their story and raise awareness of the disabilities, illnesses, impairments and invisible illnesses that they have.
Hello, My name is Alanna and I am from Kent, UK. I have been living with non-epileptic seizures for 3 years now and PTSD for almost 6 years but today I’ll just be sharing my seizure story.
I don’t think there are common symptoms, not that I have found anyway. I only began suffering after being hit on the head with a locker door (yes it sounds funny but the aftermath really isn’t). I know an attack is going to happen by noticing a few things:
- My body temperature rises really quickly, I’m like an oven!
- My eyes glaze over and I can no longer see.
- I get a stabbing pain in my head, it starts as a headache but the pain increases and gets sharper.
I have been really lucky recently and I have found my main triggers so I have been able to avoid them as much as possible so I don’t have an attack. Back when I first started suffering, I was having a seizure everyday, not just one, but multiple a day. It’s painful, your whole body aches afterwards and you are left with no energy at all. I quite often had to miss school because I simply could not get up and do things like a normal person afterwards.
After finding that being unwell was one of my triggers, I try my best to stay away from anyone who has been ill recently, even people who are coming down with a cold. That’s a little more difficult at work because I work in a care home for the elderly and someone is always sick.
Being stressed is also a main trigger, so I have to do my best to go with the flowand not worry about the things I cannot change. It’s definitely easier said than done.
I recently had a tonsillectomy and my seizures kicked off massively, my body didn’t know how to react which caused me to stress and I couldn’t control myself. That day was definitely a scary day!
What people may not realise is that it’s not just your body moving without your control, in attacks, I actually stop breathing while foaming at the mouth and having huge convulsions. It’s a scary time to look back on because I actually almost died. They were getting ready to defibrillate me to retart my heart when I finally began breathing again. The pain after that seizure was unbearable.
Learning To Adapt
I don’t think I have yet fully adapted to this lifestyle, I am always at such a risk, I am not really allowed to go out by myself in case I have an attack. Being 20 years of age and not being able to be “normal” and do things that others my age are doing, such as clubbing, going to parties, spending hours out with friends, I can’t really do that and it’s definitely left me feeling like I am missing out.
Maybe as I grow older, I’ll adapt more to it, but right now, I definitely just find it hard and feel very sorry for myself.
Changing As A Person
I have definitely changed as a person because of it. I would say that my confidence is very low now, I am always worried that people are looking at me the wrong way, that people think I’m a freak because when I have an attack, it comes so quickly there’s nothing I can do about it. I feel like I look at life differently now too, for so long I dreamed of doing so many “cool” things, you know, fitting in with the crowd but I am definitely learning what’s important in life and what’s not.
I feel like I am growing up a lot quicker than some others because of it, but I am also grateful that I’m learning certain things now before it’s too late.
My Favourite Superheroes
Do I have to pick just one? I absolutely love Batman, I have loved him since I was a kid, but there’s something so special about Hulk isn’t there, I don’t know, it might just be me, but I’d have to say those two.
Thanks Alanna for sharing your story with my readers and me!