I Need A Moment

This week should be enjoyable, but so far, it’s been the complete opposite.

I was going to write this last night but I was in so much pain trying to control a panic attack that I didn’t have the energy to type.

My head is all over the place…

My Nan had a fall last Friday and, thank god, she pressed her panic alarm. Mum was trying to contact her and she was getting worried as my Nan didn’t answer her phone. After a few more attempts, finally got through, but it was a paramedic who answered and told Mum that Nan had a fall and was on the way to hospital.

An x-ray confirmed that she’d fractured her hip.

She had an operation on her hip on Sunday and she has to stay in hospital for the next few weeks… which means she won’t be able to attend our wedding.

I’ve been trying to keep calm but when I’m on my own, I just break down and cry.

Me and mum went to see her after physio on Monday, she’s always so happy to see me. She was still really tired from the operation so we didn’t stay for too long. But before we left, the doctor came around to assess her.

The doctor said she has a slight chest infection. They started treating Nan with antibiotics to hopefully clear it before it gets worse.

But I’m not happy… because of certain people acting like they give a damn about Nan, when they pick and choose when to be in contact with her. I’m not happy that people are making out that Nan is worse than she is.

I’m fuming.

People have no fucking respect or compassion, but as soon as one is in hospital, suddenly they act like the doting relative.

Fucks me off.

Then quite a few people have cancelled on us, mucked us about with regards coming to the wedding.

It’s just one bad thing after another.

I’m sorry that I’m not replying to comments and emails at the moment. Im really trying, I’m just exhausted.

I’m sorry.

10 thoughts on “I Need A Moment

  1. Ami, don’t let them get to you. I’m sure your Nan will be fine. People who only visit at the hospital and on holidays tick me the freak off. It’s those who just want something. It usually has nothing to do with the person they are visiting…for the most part.

    I’m sorry she had to miss your wedding. But I guarantee she was there is spirit and very happy for you both 😊

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you Stuart πŸ™‚ my Nan is transferring to a rehabilitation hospital today so things are definitely looking better for her! Ewan and I went to see her tuesday night and showed her lots of photos and videos, gave her a buttonhole and took our guest book so she could write in it. She was really happy that I mentioned her in my speech and told everyone to think of her when her chosen song was played. Lovely and reassuring to see her laugh and smile πŸ™‚πŸ’š


  2. My grandmothers and grandfather had similar experiences and two broke their hips. I’m so sorry to hear about your Nan’s fall! I was disappointed when my grandmother couldn’t attend my wedding too. Praying she has a quick and easy recovery!

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Oh Ami I’m really sorry to hear about your Nan’s fall and the fact she is in hospital. That must have given you and your mum such a fright! I hope your Nan makes a speedy recovery, but such a shame that it has happened. I know you must be so worried about her. I have relatives like that too who act all worried about family members when it suits them so I can understand how pissed off it makes you feel! What a pain that folk are cancelling on you so near to the wedding date. That must be frustrating when everything has been ordered and paid for.

    I know it’s easy for me to say, but try to take a breather, relax and think about your happy day on Saturday. I know you won’t feel like it, but your Nan will want you to enjoy your day to the full and it may help her to know you are being strong and getting on with things and she will be so proud and delighted when she sees your wedding photos and hears all about your lovely day.

    As for the guests who have cancelled on you, I know it’s annoying, but it’s them who are missing out on sharing your wonderful day. I hope you feel a bit better as the week goes on and you have a magical wedding day! You know where I am if you need to talk. Thinking of you and sending you love and hugs. xxx

    Liked by 2 people

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