It’s safe to say that I didn’t have any plans for 2020, and it was a good job I didn’t as I wasn’t expecting to fall pregnant so quickly, and that a global pandemic would be at the forefront! I have a love/hate relationship with the unexpected, and I felt 2020 was pulling at me from both ends.
Nevertheless, a new year has begun, well we are already the third month in…
People usually write up these type of posts on New Year’s Day, or some time during January. No, not me… who wants to be like everyone else, ey?
So, what do I want to aim for in 2021?
Get A Laptop
I have had 3 laptops in the past, and absolutely loved typing. Not writing, just typing. I could type much quicker than I could run. So, when I started to experience altered sensations in my hands, and lose my grip, I was devastated that I might never be able to type on a keyboard again. I missed the feel of tapping away, it never felt the same when typing on a touch-screen.
It has been on my wishlist since being discharged from rehab, I found the thought of having to try out different adaptations to use with a computer or laptop, rather daunting. I kept thinking it would all be too much hassle, and I was worried that I wouldn’t get the same amount of enjoyment out of it like I used to.
With technology evolving faster than Pokemon (I dislike Pokemon by the way, the reference just popped into my head), surely I would be able to find one which would suit my needs?
Update – After lots of researching, I settled on the ASUS Chromebook and now own one! The accessibility isn’t perfect but it does everything I would like it to do. The keyboard is a perfect size, and I have the option of using the mouse or the touchscreen. It’s a 2-in-1 Chromebook,which means I can use it as a laptop or a tablet.
Honestly, I could feel the spark as my fingers touched they keyboard (no, It wasn’t an electric shock). I didn’t want to get my hopes up about my typing speed due to my lack of co-ordination. However, it turns out that I can type quickrr then I had anticipated. I’m thrilled to bits!
Rebuild My Confidence With Standing
I knew that being pregnant would impact my mobility in the third trimester, however I didn’t expect to lose all of my confidence when standing withh my frame, or attempting to stand unaided. I know that the excruciatig pain I experienced after the epidural wore off, has been a huge contributor to this. My back is still not right but it is a lot better than what it was. So, I hope to rebuild my strength and confidence again.
Be Able To Walk With My Ftame Again
Akin to what I mentioned above, because I don’t trust myself when standing with my frame or unaided, this also means I cannot walk for the time being. I probably can but I’m just absolutely petrified to try. I think this is because I’m worried I will suddenly experience pain in my back, which will distract me, therefore I’d end up falling. My ultimate fear is falling, instead of tackling this as a whole, I’ve broken it down into smaller goals so I can rebuild the trust within myself.
Get A New Powerchair
I’ve mentioned once or twice before that my current powerchair is no longer suitable for me. I need a firmer back-rest, preferably one that is tall enough to support my back and my head. I can support my head but I need regular breaks to prevent tension in my neck and shoulders. Also, I would like foot-rests which are slightly tilted to prevent my feet from slipping off, and leg-rests which would support my calves.
Living out in the countryside would mean I’d need a durable and robust powerchair. Preferably in green, but a girl can dream!
Update – Before being discharged from rehab, I was assessed by NHS Wheelchair Services to find a manual wheelchair which was right for me, and also potentially a powerchair but this depended on if they deemed my home to be accessible for one.. Turned out it wasn’t accessible (suitable ramps/lowered door pane/etc) BUT if and when adaptations were made, then I could be re-assessed for a powerchair.
I was kindly given the powerchair I currently have, by a friend of Mum’s. But now I am back on the waiting list with NHS Wheelchair Services, so fingers crossed some time this year I may have a new one!
Write More Chapters For My Recovery Story
I;ve not touched my recovery story since 2019, and I still have so much to write. I think I just came to a standstill with it, leaving it alone while the memories were at the back of my mind. As it’s been so long since I composed a chapter, I will need to read through it all again up to the point where I left it. But I need to do that when I feel ready . I did find that writing about my recovery in detail was cathartic, and I hope I get the same feeling when I resume writing.,
Resume ‘The Reality of…’ Series
With the amount of anxiety surrounding the pandemic in 2020, I didn’t feel comfortable with reaching out to others to see if they would like to raise awareness and feature in the series, I would have felt extremely selfish if I had. So, I decided it would pause for the time being, and resumed at a later date.
Update – ‘The Reality of…’ series will resume April 2nd, and new posts will be published fortnightly. This is so I can write other content and try to be more consistent.
Read and Update Old Blog Posts
Not just guest posts, but my own posts too, I need to check all the links still work, and edit any broken links too. Maybe update a few golden oldies as well. I would love to create suitable graphics which would fit with the style of my blog, but I am hopeless at designing graphics.
While I was pregnant with Daisy, I gained about 1 and a half stone. Since I was at rehab, and throughout 2019, I managed to stay at 12 and a half stone. I would love to be at that weight again, but I need to change a few things to achieve that. My downfall is snacking at lunchtime instead of a cooked meal, I’m hoping I revert back to this as it helped significantally with maintaining my weight. I just lost all willpower when I was pregnant.
What are your goals for 2021?
– Ami 💚